new beginnings
This year I have been setting goals for myself in a way that I never thought possible. I never thought I would be telling myself to start a 401k. Like seriously, back in the day I thought I was too young to start that.
Now at 28 I wish I started sooner. I never thought of a future for me. I just lived in the moment, took the struggle bus and held on tight for another bump in the road. Because that's what happened. I never prepared and when I was strapped for cash, and I mean making that $10 in my bank account last a week until pay day, I always just knew that it would work out. Even now, when I financially struggle a little bit, I know that I'll be okay, I'll make it work, because I did it in the past with less than what I'm struggling with now.
That's the thing about me most people don't know. Mainly because I don't advertise my net worth, but because I never wanted pity, or sympathy from others. So I struggled, watched my bank account go into the negatives at times and cried in my apartment alone. I remember I was so overwhelmed with everything, living on my own paying everything and then not budgeting correctly for groceries. I survived on ramen noodles, and peanut butter sandwiches for two weeks.
But still to this day, no matter if I have $10 or $100 dollars, if someone came up to me and told me they were struggling, I figured out how to help them. Because I know that feeling. The absolute courage you even had to ask for help is amazing. So If I was struggling with $20 that week and you needed help, well now I was dealing with $10. That's just who I am.
I don't say that for brownie points or a pat on the back, I say that because never in my years of struggle did I think I'd be taking the next steps to qualify for a home.
A home people. With a mortgage and everything, under the name of me, myself, and I.
Now again, I always say this always when I get good news in my life, I'm not hopeful for much, but even a little is something. I know I won't have my dream home of a wrap around porch and land and a room dedicated just for my books. I know that I'm going to have to compromise a lot, envision a lot, and overall just stay positive when I see my results. I know that more than likely the walls are going to have a dreadful color and the flooring will probably have to get redone. I know that there's going to be projects in the home that I end up in.
But let's look at all the positives to that!
I get to paint the walls whatever color I want, change the flooring to whatever I want and do as many little projects to make it MY home. Not an apartment, not someone's home I help out with fixing up for them. Mine. My. Home.
I no longer will have an upstairs neighbor, or a neighbor that does his daily naked routine in front of his window every morning. Actually, who knows about the neighbor, but that's what curtains are for!
I would get to have a driveway again. I'd get to enjoy a backyard all to myself again. The possibilities are endless and I can't believe I am doing this! On my own. ON MY OWN!!!
I'm not 'moving into a starter home' with a significant other, I'm making this move on my terms, and I am so proud of myself. Now again, it's in the early stages. I JUST got off the phone with a realtor and we have to talk about financial. But it's happening!
I just wanted to hop on here to let you know that, even if you see your friends or people your age doing things you THINK you should already be doing, be patient. It may not be your time right now, but it will come for you and when it does, it's going to click in place. The puzzle piece is going to fit and you're going to feel this sense of amazing fulfillment.
I mean look at me! My successes recently only happened in the last year. I got a new car for myself, I got a promotion at work, I'm more dedicated to finishing my book, started a savings account, started a 401k and now looking into getting a home. That took falling at a low point in my life after my break up.
I was at the bottom of the well with no way out until one day, I found a stone and started to pick myself up and out of that hole.
So needless to say as I wrap this up I'm excited, but I'm trying to stay humble about it too. I don't want to put any bad juju out in the world. So help me keep the positive vibes and hope that I get something amazing!
Until next time,
Nicole Lynn
